Truth Hurts, by Jennifer Wright
What the Hell, Wendy!
You always said we could tell each other anything. Then, when I do tell you how I feel, you stop talking to me. Well, I’ve barely scratched the surface of what I wanted to say to you.
First, being involved in all this drama makes me sick. Our husbands are brothers, connected by blood. Just like their mother, and their sisters, and everyone else in the family that you two never talk to anymore.
Am I just another one of them, another person in the family you don’t want to deal with?
I don’t want to care, but I find myself not being able to avoid caring. You have always prided yourself on being an honest person who in return can hear honesty from her friends. What happened to that person? Would you rather I lied to you?
Well, honey, from a distance, it appears you are the one tearing everyone apart. Jack never ignored his mother before you. He never acted like his brother wasn’t also his friend, and he never disappointed his family and friends like he has since he’s been with you.
Don’t get me wrong. Everyone understands you all are a family now. We know how much he loves you. It is completely obvious how much he loves all the kids. No one who really cares about him could deny him that.
What I don’t understand is why he doesn’t stand up and tell everyone how he feels. If he is really the one who doesn’t want anything to do with the family, then you need to tell him that he should be the one to stand up and say something. Don’t you think that would be better? People wouldn’t blame you then.
If you ask me, Jack needs to grow some balls and stand up for what he believes in, and spare you the pain and suffering, if that truly is the case.
But, you see, nobody believes it is Jack making the decisions because no one ever gets to talk to him. When they do get to talk to him, you speak for him and over him. Think of how you would feel if you asked me to go bowling but my husband spoke before I could and said, “She doesn’t like bowling.”
Do you see what I mean? It would “appear” he is the one making the decisions for me.
The second thing I want to tell you is that nobody likes people who lie. Just don’t do it; it makes people not trust you. I know you lied when Jack’s sister invited you over. You said Jack didn’t want to go, and then you conveniently had company that night, and to top it off, someone actually heard you say you did not want to go.
You know what? Suck it up!
Having family is a part of life. Both his family and yours are tied into our lives. No, it won’t always be a wonderful experience, but when someone dies, you’ll be spared the guilt of being the one who blamed for the distance. He says that would not happen, but you should know better.
People tell me what you two do is none of my business. Well, it is my business, because when you tell your lies, or even just ignore others, I am the one who has to make excuses for you. My husband and I are dragged into the middle of this because you and Jack won’t talk to anyone.
Is it that freaking hard to pick up the phone?
Well, I guess we don’t have to worry about that now since you aren’t talking to me either.
Another thing I have to tell you is that I am not stupid. I know that you don’t like my husband. You have lied to me for a long time and said you loved him like a brother and all that junk. Well, I hear and I see things. The point being, I don’t really care if you like my husband.
That never prevented me from being your friend.
I think you are being very childish. Sending expensive electronics to school with children to return them to me, instead of getting off your high horse and calling me or bringing it to a responsible adult, is childish. I don’t blame my husband one bit for calling you guys and saying he didn’t appreciate it. It could have been stolen or damaged.
I have an email even, so if you didn’t want to talk to me you could have given me a heads up and just sent a message.
Well, I really have a million more things to say. However, my main point has been addressed.
In closing, I would like to say that I love you. You are my sister and for you to ever think that just because I told you something true that I wouldn’t want to be your friend is just stupid. Yeah, you’re stupid for being able to dish it out, but not being able to take it.
Furthermore, it breaks my heart someone I considered a mature, loving, caring, supportive best friend could act so immaturely.
Sometimes you have to tell your friends the truth, even if they don’t want to hear it. That is what real friends do. You should realize if someone cares enough to tell you when you are wrong, they probably really are your friend. People who don’t care don’t care enough to say anything.
Love J.
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Jennifer Wright is a mother of four, military wife, and aspiring writer. She is currently attending North Idaho College and pursuing her degree in English. Jennifer has several articles published on the internet, but hopes to pursue her dream of fiction writing.
Ah, there’s one in every family. He’ll wake up and see the light someday, if it is her keeping him isolated.
There is definitely raw emotion written all over this. Sorry that you have to deal with such immaturity.
It shows a lot of maturity and wisdom that you did not attribute this problem to only one person. I’ve experienced situations like this and initially (and briefly) thought it was one person’s doing.
Someday her husband will resent her because she alienated him from his family. Why oh why can’t some people grow up and stop feeling jealous of the original family unit? Its sad to think you have to make excuses for her. I’m glad you’ve stopped doing that. No matter how the relationship between you and her ends up, I hope the brothers will stay brothers in every sense of the word.
Real friends do tell you the truth, even when it hurts. The girl isn’t doing herself any favours by acting this way. Bravo Jennifer for standing up and saying what needed to be said. I hope this resolves one day without all out war.
I agree with Gillian here. I hope one day this can be resolved peacefully.
Jenn–
I’m sorry for your pain. I hope she sees the light.
Love ya,
Cin
Nicely done! It will come back to bite her in the butt one of these days, unless things change. Maybe she will actually see this letter and it will help.