Dear Fat Girl, by Rissa Watkins

Dear Fat Girl,

Step away from the buffet table for a minute, because we need to talk.

You and I have always been at odds with each other. I would join the gym, and you would eat a piece of birthday cake at an office birthday party. We had a rivalry, but we still liked each other.

You used to occasionally indulge. You never drank regular soda or ate candy bars. Lately, that has changed. You have become a glutton, and quite frankly, you disgust me.

I understand that you have suffered a big loss and feel guilty about it. I know you have been depressed. You have been stuffing food into your mouth to try to fill that ache inside. It won’t work. There aren’t enough doughnuts in the world to fill the pain.

You keep making excuses. You are too busy to cook a good meal, and hey, it is so cheap to upsize. How cheap are the hospital bills going to be when your heart explodes? You say your clothes must have shrunk in the dryer. No, honey, you are just getting fatter by the minute.

When you see people who haven’t seen you in a few years, they try to cover their shock at how big you’ve grown. They peer into your chubby little face looking for me behind all those chins.

Quite frankly, I have had enough.

You declared war on me. You tried to silence me with your brownies and cookies. You think I am gone? You’re wrong. I am here, and I am pissed.

I will not let you eat us into oblivion. I have a beautiful son to raise. I don’t want him to go to school and hear comments about his fatso mom. I don’t want to be so out of shape that I can’t run and play with him at the park. I don’t want to die from a heart attack or diabetes complications because I let you win. I want to see him grow up. I want to hold my grandchildren.

If it is a choice between you and me, I choose me. I can hear you screaming to be heard when I pass a bakery or when I make dessert for the family. You are wasting your time. I am not listening anymore.

I have made lifestyle changes. I am eating better and exercising. You know what? I went to meet friends for coffee at a doughnut shop today. The place gave us free doughnut holes. I didn’t eat one. I could hear you, faintly whispering, but I ignored you.

I stepped on the scale today. I lost 4 pounds this week. Do you know how many doughnut holes that is? Oh, wait, you probably do.

I kept all the old clothes that you couldn’t fit in anymore. I am going to get into them again. You know what else? I am going to lose so much weight that they will be too big for me soon and I will go shopping for a whole new wardrobe.

Give up the fight, fat girl; you’ve already lost. In fact, you are going to keep losing and keep losing until those same people peer into my face, looking past the cheekbones and dainty chin for you. They won’t find you though, because I am taking over. I am reclaiming my body and my life and you will only be someone in pictures of the past.

The Skinny girl


Rissa is a writer, mother, wife and scarred veteran of the battle of the bulge. Her weapon of choice has always been humor in all her roles. To learn more about Rissa go to her website

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25 Responses to “Dear Fat Girl, by Rissa Watkins”

  1. Suzanne Alicie says:

    Wonderful letter, and so great to be the skinny girl inside who finally defeats the fat girl! This is a wonderful confidence booster.

  2. Gillian says:

    Love the humour on what is a painful and difficult subject for so many of us.

  3. Linda Johnson says:

    Yes, yes, this is the old war, between the pouting, “gimme me girl” who never gets enough and doesn’t care if she kills you as long as she can have her next food fix — and the real girl who desperately wants to be her own friend. Real girl doesn’t ever go away, though she may weaken for a bit, she’ll be back. Here’s to Real Girl and her next victory! Thanks for this great letter.

  4. amy says:

    thanks for sharing, you could be writing from my pov.. hugs

  5. Lyn Lomasi says:

    I love the way you used humor to overcome what is a difficult struggle for many.

  6. Andi Caldwell says:

    I recognize that all too well. Nicely done.

  7. Amy says:

    Very candid Rissa….I feel myself in your piece…

  8. M. Safranski says:

    Oh, Rissa, I love this! Wow, you speak for so many of us. I started beating the crap out of mine a few years ago, and this wonderful, funny letter will inspire me to keep doing so! You go girl!

  9. Linda St.Cyr says:

    I really love this letter because I’d like to squash the fat girl in me too!

  10. Ahhh, I can relate to this. :) I battled the bulge (and won, big time) after having my daughter. Never ever will that chunky girl get me down again.

    You rock, Rissa. You tell that “Fat Girl” who’s boss.

  11. Bobbi Leder says:


    How clever to write a letter to one’s self – it’s brilliant!

    I, too, have struggled with my weight and I can tell you that the struggle never ends ….even when the weight is gone. The fat girl will live inside you forever – like it or not – but fortunately the skinny girl inside is more powerful and informed.

    Great job Rissa!

  12. Cathy Doheny says:

    Excellent letter, Rissa! I can totally relate! I have been both of these girls many times. It is a lifetime battle for me. Your letter is so inspiring!

  13. Susan Ayers says:

    This letter is awesome – so honest and compelling.

  14. Theresa Leschmann says:

    Amazing honesty. It’s like you reached into myheart and said what I’ve been thinking for so long. Inspirational.

  15. Cyndee says:

    Intervention at it’s finest! You go girlfriend!

  16. Lea Ann says:

    very well done Rissa! you speak for us all!

  17. Tammy Waters says:

    Love this letter Rissa! It could be talking to my own fat girl who is battling with me. This is the little piece of motivation I needed today, thanks so much!

  18. Kim says:

    Great letter Rissa! I was going to read this and head down to the cafeteria for Subway but now I’m just going to get a bottle of water.

  19. Kristi Cramer says:

    This isn’t just a letter, it’s an anthem to anyone who has fought the chunky girl that has tried to take over. Let’s all finally kick that girl to the curb, leave her at the donut shop, and start hanging out at places she’d never find us – like the treadmill or the farmer’s market!

  20. Angel says:

    Good luck to you, Rissa. I know you can kick the fat girls butt!

    I’ve been trying to kick mine’s, but she’s holding on for dear life…lol. I did manage to take 2 pounds away from her last month. Baby steps for me. Well, not many steps at all since I sprained my ankle and busted my knee, but you know what I mean.

    Stick to your guns!

  21. Rose (Plntpolice) says:

    Bravo, Rissa!
    Keep up the fight. The fat girl destroyed my joints and causes me endless arthritic pain. You have youth on your side and can win the battle before it’s too late. Never give up.
    I know how difficult and baffling it can be. Why do we do what we know to be harmful? Why do we repeatedly do what we swear we won’t do?
    I try to remember that every baby step helps. Just as each cookie added its small contribution to the problem, each sensible meal adds its benefit. So I do what I can do, one day at a time.

  22. Don says:

    i Digg it! You’re in the running now.

  23. mrsacevedo says:

    Great letter Rissa. I’ve read your letter several times when I wanted to skip my walking routine and just sit in front of the computer. Very motivating- Thanks!

  24. Jo Brielyn says:

    Yeah, you tell that fat girl where she can go, Rissa! Great article. I love your humorous approach to a sometimes touchy subject.

  25. amy says:

    tell the fat chick to mind her own business, you my dear Rissa are doing fine.


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